When Funding Opportunities Hurt your Heart
Like so many, I entered the nonprofit field as one driven toward meaningful work, helping people, and solving problems. I quickly became drawn into a development shop's competitive environment and thrived on the opportunity to create order, drive results, and achieve. In doing so, I got a little lost from my original purpose and years later, started to search for a path back.
It turns out it's surprisingly easy to wind up fundraising for purposes to which you're not personally committed to or perhaps even in agreement with. I've reflected on the times this happened to me in my career (like the times I raised scholarship money for investment bankers while working to pay off my student loans on a nonprofit salary; and again when I was raising money for chemical deregulations at work then coming home to make my family organic lotions, soaps, and baby food). I don't want to point a finger or accuse an organization of doing something immoral. These were not immoral funding opportunities. They were just against my grain. Does it matter?
As I further thought of it…. There has been an instance (to varying degrees) in every position I've held. Whether you're a budding fundraising or a seasoned pro in a struggle, here's my advice when funding opportunities start to hurt your heart.
1. Accept that it is inevitable.
Even in organizations that are the most closely aligned with our spirit, there will be differences in opinion on priorities, strategy, and even values. Differences are valuable. They push us to consider all sides and remember that those we represent are likely to have diverse experiences, opinions, and needs too. Our differences around the leadership table should reflect them. Try to see yourselves as more similar than different (you all decided to work for that organization, after all. The starting point may be that basic.).
2. Claim your voice.
You're more than just the person who raises the money. I've struggled with this in my career as I like clearly delineated roles and responsibilities. But the truth is that fundraisers are the eyes and ears of the organization. We have the invaluable outside perspective of knowing our donors and constituents. We represent them as well as our own expertise and experiences. The former comes more easily to me than the latter but I'm now more purposeful and intentional in believing in what I bring to the table.
3. Know when to compromise.
Like any relationship, we must know when to give and when to take. Is the conflict you feel so strongly about that it needs to claim your worry? Or, is this one you can say, "it's not my jam, but there's enough other stuff I'm into that it's worth it."?
4. Seek outside counsel.
In peers, in professionals, and mentors. I had the luxury of working with an executive coach who helped me both lead change and figure out who I am as a leader. Everyone who has been through therapy knows the value of a neutral party. Admitting what you don't know and are afraid of can be liberating and necessary in making decisions. If you don't have the budget for a coach, get with a peer at another organization to brainstorm and bounce ideas with. I have a dear friend (and former colleague) with whom I "go on walks" weekly on the phone. Even though we now live in different parts of the country, we can walk and talk out our ideas. I always leave our walks grateful.
5. Know when to move on.
Organizations change—leadership changes. Campaigns can change the trajectory of a mission even. Stay in tune with which way the wind is blowing and take no shame in moving on when it is time. We're not selling widgets here (some days, we wish, don't we?), and to successfully sell a vision, it's got to be from a sincere. You may be able to get by halfheartedly, but you could always do better with your whole heart. You owe that to yourself, and your organization deserves a representative whose whole heart is there, even if it's not yours.